Humor Quotes

Humor is by far the most significant activity of the human brain.

- Edward de Bono

I can't understand why people are frightened of new ideas. I'm frightened of the old ones.

- John Cage

When people are laughing, they're generally not killing each other.

- Alan Alda

You grow up the day you have your first real laugh at yourself.

- Ethel Barrymore

Good humor is a tonic for mind and body. It is the best antidote for anxiety and depression. It is a business asset. It attracts and keep friends. It lightens human burdens. It is the direct route to serenity and contentment.

- Greenville Kleisser

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I like nonsense. It wakes up the brain cells.

- Dr. Seuss

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Humor is emotional chaos remembered in tranquillity.

- James Thurber

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My way of joking is to tell the truth. It's the funniest joke in the world.

- George Bernard Shaw

I have always noticed that people will never laugh at anything that is not based on truth.

- Will Rogers

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Everything is changing. People are taking the comedians seriously and the politicians as a joke

- Will Rogers

Laughter rises out of tragedy, when you need it the most, and rewards you for your courage.

- Erma Bombeck

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The beauty of the world has two edges, one of laughter, one of anguish, cutting the heart asunder.

- Virginia Woolf

Angels can fly because they take themselves lightly; devils fall because of their gravity.

- G. K. Chesterton

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The Procrastinator's Creed:

1. I believe that if anything is worth doing, it would have been done already.

2. I shall never move quickly, except to avoid more work or find excuses.

- Unknown

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Humor is a universal language.

- Joel Goodman

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Humor is a serious thing. I like to think of it as one of our greatest earliest natural resources, which must be preserved at all cost.

- James Thurber

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And we should consider every day lost on which we have not danced at least once. And we should call every truth false which was not accompanied by at least one laugh.

- Friedrich Nietzsche

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The secret source of humour itself is not joy, but sorrow. There is no humour in heaven.

- Mark Twain

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- from the Institute for Stork Research and Science
Two different theories exist concerning the origin of children: the theory of Sexual reproduction, and the theory of the stork. Many people believe in the theory of sexual reproduction because they have been taught this theory at school. In reality, however, many of the world's leading scientists are in favor of the theory of the stork. If the theory of sexual reproduction is taught in schools, it must only be taught as a theory and not as the truth. Alternative theories, such as the theory of the stork, must also be taught.

- Unknown

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